Every human problem depends on Fear. Fear is nothing but Denial of something. Denial it means Not Accept what it is or could be. So one's happiness and the realization of one's goals end to depend by conditions that are not under his control. In short, those who Are Afraid (who Not Accept) achieve their goals only when the case so permits. Transforming "it must not" in "is better than not, but that's okay too", one regains control of his happiness, his goals, his live. Transforming the Non-Acceptance in Acceptance, you start to be happy now; you should not expect something to happen. At the same time, you continue to try to improve, because "it is better" even if not necessary, that things will change. To know what is the essence of a problem, what is the specific "not-acceptance" that the problem hides behind it, just ask a simple question, recursively.
What happens if X is realized?
Where X stands for the thing that scares us, what we refuse and do not accept, for that thing that must not happen. Recursively means that after the response Y, one should posed the same question again.
What if Y is realized?
And keep digging with the same question until is achieved a response, beyond which, despite the insistence and the framing of the question, you can not proceed. So you will be able to identify whichone of the 10 dimensions that we have identified as fundamental and universal is the essence of your problem.
Here are some examples
Unhappy Person: I'm not able to say no.
StoRyforging: What happens if you say no?
U: I could never say no, because if I say no, then they stop to love me...
S: And what if they stop to love you?
U: It's a mess ... should not happen .... I have to be loved
So you have identified the essence: Fear (not acceptance) of the Judgments of Others.
U: I'm always undecided ...
S: What if you take a decision?
U: no no, I just can not ...
S: What would happen if you take it aniway?
U: Well ... I might take the wrong one .... I could do damage ...
S: What happens if you take the wrong decision?
U: Well, my wife (my boss, my colleagues, my friends) would think that I'm a failure
S: What if your wife thinks you are a failure?
U: Well, then she'll come to not love me anymore and leave me alone!
S: What happens if she do not love you anymore and leaves you?
U: No, no, it must not happen in any way... would be the end...
So you have identified two dimensions: Fear of Being Judged by Others and Fear of Death (the end of a relationship is a special type of death).
To help you recognize what is the essence of the problem, here is a non-exhaustive list of the possible relationships between some common problems and 10 Dimensions.
